Young'un = contraction of "young one"

Young'un = contraction of "young one", a slang term for any child.

There are a few secrets to raising children. The first one is you should learn to use words like "young'un" often. Or rug rats, house apes, ankle biters, anything that sounds funny and disrespectful and takes a little of the seriousness out of the situation.

Therefore, lesson number one is: stop being so serious!

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Babies laugh and cry all the time. If you laugh more and cry less, they will too. So lighten up. Children can be tough. They can even be somewhat maddening sometimes. If you have a naked baby in one hand, a very poop-filled diaper in the other hand and you're trying to answer a phone with just your nose, that's funny. Laugh man, just laugh! You can always find something funny in it.

Lesson number two most of the time, babies don't need clothes or shoes, just a diaper. What's the point really of dressing your kid up just for play on the carpet in a climate controlled environment? That's just more laundry you gotta do. And when you have to change a diaper the clothes are in the way. If you're going out, ok, dress them up nice, but at home, keep your house a comfortable temperature and they'll do fine with just a diaper. Even playing outside, depending on your terrain, you may still do fine with just a diaper. If you've got some sharp gravel or something and the baby is actually going to get hurt, put some shoes and long clothes on the little rascal. Otherwise, diaper.

Lesson three, always always always talk to a young'un of any age like a person. Speak English. Goo-goo-gah-gah doesn't mean anything more to them than it does to you. From the age of just a few weeks, that baby is trying to learn the ropes, trying to figure out what's going on here, how you communicate, how you work the levers of a body to make sounds, to move it, etc. With stupid baby talk you force them to expend precious time and energy trying to learn that language and then one day, unexpectedly, you stop speaking it and they have to learn a whole new language. If I we're a baby I'd be really ticked off. Maybe they are.

Lesson four is a very precious lesson. You can never love your rug rats too much. Show them all the affection you want. Tell them you love them every single day, and mean it! Even in the times when you just wish you had drowned them before you got attached to them, remember that you love them, and tell them so, repeatedly.

Lesson five, spanking. This is not really a lesson at all. At least I'm not going to teach it to you. I'm not going to tell you not to spank your kid; I'm definitely not going to tell you that you should do it. I will tell you that the more intelligent young'uns will not respond well to spanking. You're just going to make them mad and they will diabolically get back at you someday. For the rest of them, well, if you want to know whether you should spank or not, and why, read Dianetics by L. Ron Hubbard. That book contains the secrets of what happens when any individual experiences physical pain and unconsciousness. So read it, and then decide.

Lesson six, NO sugar, NO television, NO soft drinks (especially not diet drinks), NO food out of a box! In this case "NO" means "just a little".

Lesson seven NO PSYCHIATRY! If someone, psych or medical doctor, tries to label your young'un with a mental disorder, like ADD/ADHD, OCD, Depression, or any of the 374+ mental disorders listed in the DSM IV, there is only one thing to do. Kick that person in the shin and run. And also know this the symptoms of mental illness are real. If your young'un is having a hard time in life, get some real help. Education/nutrition, a REAL medical exam from a real NON-psychiatric doctor, look into allergies, toxicity, cut back the TV and sugar, find out what is REALLY going on and help your little ones be healthy, happy and successful.

If it's too late for you and your yard apes have already been diagnosed with a mental disorder and/or on drugs for it, be very careful. Do NOT stop treatment on your own. Withdrawal from psychiatric drugs can be very dangerous, look it up! Get competent medical care to help get your young'uns off the dangerous and addictive drugs and onto something to really help them.

Lesson number eight, the final lesson, is that you should be very careful to learn what works in your parenting, do more of that and learn what doesn't work and stop doing it. You can't go wrong with that.

One more thing. In researching this article, I found some references indicating that the term young'un comes from "young gun", not "young one". A "young gun" is: "an up-and-coming young man, especially one considered as being assertive and confident." I used it in this article to simply mean "young one" but you can feel free to use either definition.

Posted in Home Improvement Post Date 09/11/2017